These are a few of my least favorite things…

Had to accompany my father to the grocery store.  My mother asked him to go while she was at work.   He HATES being out in public, along with being soooo far behind the current times, along being a goof ball and being a racist outspoken white guy in a diverse community.  Soooo… 11 a.m. and he is biting at the bit to leave. He whines that I took the long way the whole way there. We come into the store and the first thing you see is apples.  I hand him the plastic bag and tell him to get 5. As he is trying to give me trouble (jokingly)  about “Eww, these are dirty.  I don’t know who touched these already” He loses his balance and begins falling into the apple display which starts an apple avalanche.  He’s trying to catch apples as I’m catching him and he’s giggling like a school girl at the whole situation…  We put the apples back together and make our way to the deli where they give him a sample slice like a child and he is wandering while I’m ordering. I find him pricing fresh fish and redirect him.  As we go up and down the aisles he is putting his own selections into the basket that aren’t on mom’s list and I just roll my eyes and move on.  He does OK until the drinks he likes happen to be at the end of the feminine hygiene product aisle and now he is just a chatting away about which tampons would taste best with it. We make it to checkout and there is a sweet elderly woman with a cross on that has the star of David on it. So as expected he strikes up a conversation with her about religion which was fine. He goes to pay and his card gets declined…good thing his daughter came with him…came to find out they had issued new cards very early so that card was turned off.  Get to the car and he’s just tossing stuff in. I am barely able to save the bread and eggs from destruction.  We get home and unload and he walks away…  EXCUSE ME?!?  He thought I was going to put it all away while he sat down.  WRONG!  He pretended to not know where anything went, including the milk…  Now if any of you want to try this trip, just let me know.  If you want to go double or nothing and take my 89 year old grandfather who has Alzheimer’s with you also (he lives in my parents’ house also), I have got one heck of a deal for you. :mrgreen:


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