Frustrated

I was supposed to go see my therapist on Saturday and did not get out of bed to go. This is not ideal. He is out of town all this week so no therapy until next week some time.

I know I’m dipping into the depression side of my Bipolar again. I can feel it sucking my energy and interest in anything and everything out. Have I said that I fucking hate Bipolar. I mean even if you took my diagnosis away. It wreaks havoc on anyone who has to deal with it. Whether it be the patient or the family and friends and care givers.

My daughter was researching Serial Killers for fun this weekend. She gets interested in some strange stuff but at least it is somewhat educational. She had to learn new words and use research tools. She was telling me about some of the info she got on a couple of them and it was interesting to me the turmoil they had as kids relating to them killing people. My father thinks that psychiatry is bullshit and people should suck it up and things like that. It humors me to think that we now treat these kids who have these traumas in their childhood and I would think stop many from becoming Serial killers by doing so. I mean people still kill people and go on mass shootings. I feel that is more impulsive than what a serial killer does. They pick victims strategically usually and torture them in some way or another. Idk. Kind of yucky talk before bedtime but just something that makes me go hmmm.

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